updatezz??!!

well, i know its been ages since i last updated..coz i've got nothing to blog about..some things happened here and there..some good, some not so good..but heck, life goes on..same shit, different day.. i remember saying my theme song as "if i can't have you" and i'm pretty sure this theme song will stick with me for long long time if not forever..out of ideas..to be continued...

better now

well, all i can say is that things have got better now and i really appreciate it. and the only song that plays in my head and reminds me of what have happened and what is happening now is taylor swift's you belong with me =)

=(

blogging hasn't been my favoured thing to do for the past dont know how long since i last blogged. but this post for sure isn't gonna be any nice sweet post. i'm just feeling drained, lost, broken, shattered, angry, confused, astray, meaningless, sad..whatever you name it..

just when i see a ray of hope, the next thing i know i'm in darkness again. i guess this is the best way i can say is happening. and now, i feel like a spell of bad and unfortunate event raining over me "abundantly" so much that i just don't know what to do anymore.

i thought it was all smooth sailing till one day i just felt that i got stabbed by millions of sword and the pain to bear is just the normal pain i can handle. and from then on, things just got worse. at first i made a promise,and one statement by someone made me more determined because then i see hope. and now i'm confused because i don't know what i should do or what should i feel for this someone because deep inside there's only this someone. never have i felt this much passion for a person to the point that everything i do, i want it to be best for this someone. and then a few messages came and all it did was just pierced the swords even deeper.

i'm only hoping this someone would change her mind over what this someone had said and i am, from the bottom of my heart ready to forgive and forget this moment. but its never easy to let go of someone you feel so much fore.what more the feeling that you have never felt before in your entire life about a special someone in your life. i'm sorry but no matter what i'm keeping to my words until i am not able to do anything about it.

i don't think i can say anything more here because im just losing it. and i hope and would appreciate if whoever sees this, just leave me as i am.

=)

???

i was rounding the city with some friends when suddenly someone raised this question "what does it take to have a girlfriend?" and to my surprise, another replied "money! if you have no money you can't have a girlfriend simply because you cannot support her"..

and the question i raised back is "why is money everything? what can money bring you? can money bring you happiness? so money is the passport to a relationship and without money you can't be in one?".. well, yes i agree that money brings you happiness, but how much or how long? for as long as you can afford her till your cash flow runs dry? to me though, its more of the question of the heart i guess..it don't matter if your partner is poor or rich, handsome/pretty or not so handsome/not so pretty, smart/ not so smart..its the question of are you sincerely getting in a relationship with him/her because you really love him/her as much as you love yourself. "who doesn't want a parent-in-law telling their friends that their son/ daughter in-law is rich?" left me questioning does it really matter?! its like trying to say to those less fortunate or below average families that they're failures and their in-laws should be ashamed of them? com'on give me a break!

OR

is it as simple as it gets?; look at yourself first. do you really qualify for him/her. or does him/ her really deserves you for you?

and all of the sudden someone i start thinking of someone although the little voice at the back of my head keeps yelling "fat hopes"..i succumbed to my conscience and so i texted this someone but i just don't know how to say things right. i just hope that time will play a part in this and through time, i could get this straight. i must honestly say that i am,was, and still is happy that this someone fell for someone. but i am also angry because i failed to do what i have always wanted and still want to do even before i came back from where i was this time of the year in 2008. the reason i came back was because of this someone and i still believe that this someone is the reason but i just can't help but wanting to go back merely to hide from what i cannot do as to what i plan to achieve when i come back. if this someone is reading this, i think you would know who i am because you probably received my text at just past 1am.

think about it folks. ignore the last section of this post.

*the sun is up, its time to sleep

fun post :)

here's the genting groupie cast that went up on the day's tour just for the sake of the cool weather. (l-r, clockwise: jia, yvonne,me,ryan,ben,ione)..

so we started off our journey way early in the morning for all of us i'm sure ( just because its not our usual time of being awake). from cheras to puchong to klang to genting.
so we reach genting all looking half dead cause we din't have enough sleep the night before. but as you can see in ryan's expression, things changed..

we had our battery pumped up and recharged by energizer and we were then good to go already!

first off, a decent groupie in a london-style double decker bus in which needless to say some weird-ass dumb stuff happened in there. (jia you know what you did that you had ur *erk hemm* exetended)

and then when it was time to go home, none of us actually wanted to leave especially ben and me cause of the perfect cool weather in which we miss a dozen! but what to do, din't plan to stay anyways! :)

conclusion: AWESOME!!

obviously there are more pictures which are not posted cause for some reason i could not load em up but needless to say, everything was just pure awesome right from the beginning.the people, the company, the funny-dumb-lame-ass moments..all comes out to a perfect day in which more of this should really come.

mofo!

mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo! mofo!